How do you respond when a friend says she is lonely, feeling doubtful that she will ever feel love or struggling with career or a relationship? Living in synergy means being in alignment with your feelings and freely expressing them, especially when they are the sad feelings. I feel most in synergy with myself when I express them, all of them. My intention with friends is to hold space, or ask how I can support them. I recently posted online my feelings about love…. I have doubt. To my surprise I had a lot of people comment about the post. Lots of advice…. confusion as to why I had posted my feelings. I posted “I wonder if I will ever find love.” The responses ranged from Love yourself and it will follow. Suggestions that I might be blocking it. Then attempting to be supportive then obsessively attached to my point of view. Then criticizing me for wanting physical attraction, suggesting I am being superficial. Then jumping to the conclusion that I am the problem in finding love.
How do you show up when someone you know speaks publicly about their feelings? Do you advise them on how many “mistakes” they are making and that is the reason they haven’t found love? Or do you hold space for them as they work through their feelings? Do you grill them with a bunch of questions to justify their decision to express their feelings? Or do you ask them how you can support them? The later of each of these sets of questions is about being in synergy with your friends and love ones. Living in Synergy is about being in connection with each other and holding the other when they need without question. There is a loyalty that is developed when friends and family are in a synergistic connection. To learn more about how to live in synergy contact me via email to schedule an appointment. The first 30 minute session is free.